


Reason and Love

by dark_nexus17



Category: X-Men: First Class (2011) - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Cherik - Freeform, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-26
Updated: 2013-07-26
Packaged: 2017-12-21 10:00:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/898989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dark_nexus17/pseuds/dark_nexus17
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Charles reflects on the destructive nature of his and Erik's relationship. Erik will continue to burn him, and he is powerless against the flames. Companion fic to Deceit, but you don't have to have read it to get this. Cherik slash.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Reason and Love

**Author's Note:**

> Title: Reason and Love keep little company these days.
> 
> Pairings: Charles/Erik
> 
> Warnings: Slash, violence, and a bucket load of angst.
> 
> Summary: Charles' reflections on the destructive nature of his relationship with Erik. Short little scenes.
> 
> Companion fic to Deceit. 
> 
> Also on ff.net

He's on the news again. It seems like everywhere Charles turns there are reminders of Erik that he cannot escape. The unfinished chess game in his study, his draw of clothes in their bedroom, his shaving brush in Charles' bathroom. Erik's room is like a black void now, that Charles subconsciously avoids, even though it pulls at his heart and soul with a never-ending ache.

He always knew Erik would be the death of him, in one way or another. He is the death of his legs, the bane of his heart, which now feels shrivelled and small in his chest, as though Erik is crushing it in his iron grip. He had felt the hatred and rage inside the man he would one day come to love; he thought he could save him, mend him, but he was wrong. So wrong.

Despite all the pain Erik had caused him, Charles knew that he would never stop loving him, never stop caring about him and trying to change him. Sometimes his blood boiled with anger, as he relived that dark day in Cuba. Where Erik left, no, _abandoned_ him, on the beach, left him to bleed out in the sand without a second thought. Of course, he didn't know what Erik had been thinking, because of the helmet. The helmet that belonged to Shaw. To the man who had stolen Erik from Charles. Erik had kept it as though it were a trophy: proof that Shaw no longer existed. He remained however, in the hatred Erik still felt, and that he was now utilising to wreak havoc on the unsuspecting humans of America.

They were destined to hurt one another it seemed.

***

'You hit me, you bastard.' Charles said, his voice shocked, 'That's twice now.'

'Are you counting Charles?' Erik replied, breathing heavily, 'Are you going to tally up the times I have hurt you and present the bill to me some day? You can't change a damn thing about me, and you can't stop me from hurting you.'

'I could leave.' Charles said simply, wiping his bleeding lip. He saw Erik's eyes widen with shock, and ill-disguised fear; then the mask slipped back into place, and he knew it would make no difference.

Later, as Erik thrust into him, Charles heard his lover's voice in his mind;

_Even if you left, you would still be mine, and I would still be with you. I will always be with you._

***

Charles had no idea why he continued to fight with Erik. To push his friend until he lashed out, and then to defend him to the others when they noticed Charles' injuries. Maybe it was the rough make-up sex, or the surprisingly gentle kisses that Erik pressed to his cuts and bruises. Maybe it was because their anger brought out the truth, even if it was ugly.

***

Charles could read people's minds. Often this was a curse. It was so now. He did not want to hear the rage in Erik's thoughts again, he did not want to feel the heat radiating off the man in front of him as he tied Charles to his own personal stake and burnt him alive.

'You can't change me Charles, you think you can change everyone for the better, but not me, my love. Not me.' Erik whispered as he pulled Charles down by the fire.

***

Tears are streaming down Charles' face. He is in his bedroom, and has just found one of Erik's turtlenecks; though he could have sworn he had packed all Erik's things away, in the vain hope that he would one day return.

When he feels Erik's presence in the study, he freezes for a moment, before heat rushes through his veins. The heat of anger is strong, but the flames of his love for Erik are stronger, and they give him the strength to wheel himself into the study. Erik is standing by the fire; the fire that has warmed them and watched them burn. He sees the sorrow on Erik's face, and hears him in his mind;

_Charles, forgive me. Charles, I love you._

And suddenly Charles' mind has melted into Erik's once more, and he is pulling Erik down to kiss him, and it's all so _right_. Except for the fact that it isn't. And Charles knows it never will be.

Erik will continue to destroy him. He knows this for certain, because Erik has left again, and he is pulling charred black and white kings from their bed of ashes.


End file.
